My Young Pathetic Social Life

I didn't want to get to know the kids at the softball park. I hated team sports. I did not possess the easy ability to slide in with a group of girls. I can remember back in junior high being awed when a new girl named Georgia enrolled in our school. I remember the ease at which she smoothed her way into the group of popular kids. It was as though she possessed a a sort of magic trick one in whichI was sorely lacking in my social arsenal.

Recently, I came across my report cards from my elementary school years. During those days each child's report card was handwritten.
I was often made wrong for being shy, bookish, and reticent to join in.

USE SCAN OF TEACHER'S REPORT CARD NOTES. painfully shy and overly sensitive- observes before she joins in what in the hell did that mean. as if these are qualities that need to be improved upon.


did not want to join the line-up of the other girls- did not want what they wanted only if I happened to really want that- did not want to have to change myself to be fit in- I wanted to fit in because I though that there was something wrong with me because I really did not want to.

much disservice is done to children in the name of conformity- it will take us much of our adult lives to find our lost selves, and this is a daunting and often painful process.

Latin class, knee socks and kilt, picture journalisn club. I was the pale girl in the blackwatch plaid kilt and the Shetland cardigan. I was the girl who wore the unattractive cat-eye glasses. I was the girl who got Ds in gym because I would not play team sports properly. I thought they were stupid and useless. I did not see the point.

during volleyball one day the ball had hit the upper edge ofmy pointy frames and pushed them first into the side of my nose and then onto the gym floor. Someone stepped on them. I was left relatively sightless with a huge gash on the side of my nose where the glasses had cut my face.